Liberals, Conservatives & Southerners
Don D
9,834 Posts
Three HR Managers were all in the same unenviable position. One a Southerner, one a liberal, one a regular Conservative, perhaps not from the South.
The test is, what would distinguish one from the other? All in good fun, take the test.
> Decide which of the above most closely identifies you and pose the following question:
>
> You're walking down a deserted street with your wife (or husbandif you're female) and two small
> children.
> Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around the
> corner,
> locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges.
> You
> are carrying a Glock .40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere
> seconds
> before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?
>
> Liberal Answer:
> Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
> Does the man look poor or oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him
> that
> would inspire him to attack? Could we run away? What does my wife (or husband)
> think?
> What about the kids? Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and
> knock the
> knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation?
> Does the
> Glock have an appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a
> loaded gun
> anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my
> children?
> Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely
> want to
> kill me, or would he be content just to wound me? If I were to grab his
> knees
> and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me? Should
> I call
> 9-1-1? Why is this street so deserted? We need to raise taxes, have a
> paint
> and weed day and make this a happier, healthier street that would
> discourage
> such behavior. This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with
> some
> friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.
>
> Conservative Answer:
> BANG!
>
> Southerner's Answer:
> BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
> click...(sounds of reloading).
> Wife (or husband): "Sweetheart, he looks like he's still moving...What do you kids
> think?"
> Son: "Mom's right Dad, I saw it, too."
> BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click.
> Daughter: "Nice group, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips?"
>
>
The test is, what would distinguish one from the other? All in good fun, take the test.
> Decide which of the above most closely identifies you and pose the following question:
>
> You're walking down a deserted street with your wife (or husbandif you're female) and two small
> children.
> Suddenly, a dangerous looking man with a huge knife comes around the
> corner,
> locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, raises the knife, and charges.
> You
> are carrying a Glock .40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere
> seconds
> before he reaches you and your family. What do you do?
>
> Liberal Answer:
> Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
> Does the man look poor or oppressed? Have I ever done anything to him
> that
> would inspire him to attack? Could we run away? What does my wife (or husband)
> think?
> What about the kids? Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and
> knock the
> knife out of his hand? What does the law say about this situation?
> Does the
> Glock have an appropriate safety built into it? Why am I carrying a
> loaded gun
> anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and to my
> children?
> Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me? Does he definitely
> want to
> kill me, or would he be content just to wound me? If I were to grab his
> knees
> and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me? Should
> I call
> 9-1-1? Why is this street so deserted? We need to raise taxes, have a
> paint
> and weed day and make this a happier, healthier street that would
> discourage
> such behavior. This is all so confusing! I need to debate this with
> some
> friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.
>
> Conservative Answer:
> BANG!
>
> Southerner's Answer:
> BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
> click...(sounds of reloading).
> Wife (or husband): "Sweetheart, he looks like he's still moving...What do you kids
> think?"
> Son: "Mom's right Dad, I saw it, too."
> BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click.
> Daughter: "Nice group, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips?"
>
>
Comments
True story: Portland police officer attempting to drop a fleeing felony suspect on a crowded street. Pulls his weapon, fires nine rounds, ejects the clip, reloads, empties another clip -- and every shot misses. He is terminated for reckless endangering, but an arbitrator rules he is to be reinstated later.
Guess he wouldn't have made a very good Southerner, huh, Don? x;-)
Ah.... did you notice Beagle didn't answer the question? He gave this oblique story to get us off track trying to start a debate about the Portland Police.
Actually, you could add an answer "d" on here that would fit for you, Ray. BANG-BANG. That's a "trained conservative" - never trust the first shot to be on the mark; always double-tap.
See my post above. None of the options presented were appealing. I would do the double-tap. If the first shot didn't work, the second is more likely to and you have used only that force necessary to neutralize the threat - besides, ammunition is expensive and all the noxious fumes given off by the firearm fouls the air, contributing to global warming and possibly the destruction of the Brazilian rain forest, for all I know. x;-)
I think I smell a military typewriter.
Can't trust those guys.
I agree that if you use the knife you're a psychopath. But what does it mean if you also shoot the liberal?
By the way, Rush had nothing to say baout this last night, but Ken Hamblin (the Black Avenger) did. Turns out he is a conservative being that he would limit the number of shots fired since ammo can be expensive. And he wouldn't be packing a .40, he prefers a .45
For the record I would give the Glok to my wife as she is a better shot with a pistol than I.
On the plus side, never had to decide that, hope I never do. And by the way, I am a GDI, not liberal, not conservative.