Another bullsoap theory
NaeNae55
3,243 Posts
Warning: I am ticked and sounding off.
I have been reading John Phillips' blog for a couple of weeks now (since someone here recommended it). I am disappointed in his 'man gene' theory. It was bad enough for him to write about it and proclaim it last week, but he is now talking as if it is fact and brought it up again today. Frankly, I think it is bullsoap.
For centuries man claimed it was nature that made women unequal to men. 100 years ago we couldn't even vote. We could not be trusted to since we were emotional hysterical beings who were mostly brainless. Men, after all, were passionate about their beliefs. Women were just hysterical. Men were able to learn mathematics and physical sciences, women weren't smart enough. They should just worry their little heads about keeping hubby happy and being fashion plates. Of course, there was the odd woman here and there who did understand mathematics and physical sciences (since they insisted on learning), but they were rejected by society as abnormal. We were also too delicate to do anything physical - unless you were poor or had a lazy husband. WWII proved that women could handle many 'men' jobs, and once out of the kitchen we refused to go back.
It was also claimed that blacks were by nature inferior beings. It was proved, they claimed, time and time again that slaves were dumb and lazy so therefor all blacks were dumb and lazy. Of course, when some soldiers (white men, again WWII) were captured and forced to do slave labor guess what happened? Yep, they moved as slow as possible and seemed to never understand the instructions. Amazing! African Americans and their supporters marched for their rights in the 50's and 60's and (hoo-ray) got them. They too, will never go back.
Of course both women and African Americans (and other people of color) are still fighting for what is right and fair, because prejudice runs deep and works in subtle and unsubtle ways. But now here is a new one. Though JP declares men should not give into it, sexual harrassment is often due to the 'man gene.' In other words, it is just nature. Give me a break! WHEN ARE MEN GOING TO QUIT BLAMING INEQUALITY AND UNFAIRNESS ON NATURE?
In the dark ages (as little as 50 years ago) your buddies would tell you to control your wife by a smack now and then. (If you don't remember it that way, just watch the movies McLintock or Donovan's Reef with John Wayne, a huge role model in 1963 when these movies were made.) I personally know of a case where a woman literally crawled next door after her phone was ripped out by her son-in-law because the neighbor's son was police officer. (The man hit both his wife and his mother-in-law.) The neighbor called but the cop would not come. They did not get involved in domestic disputes. Fortunately, since that time a woman won her court case against the police in her town (after her husband nearly killed her), and things have changed. Though many women are still killed every year by their lovers, things have improved and more and more women are able to reach out for help and escape their situations. We also now have phsychological help for those men who beat and harm their lovers and children, though only time will tell if it really helps.
I have read about studies that show that men think about sex all day. Thoughts of it repeatedly enter their heads during the course of work and play. But that is natural right? Of course, it has nothing to do with others telling you repeatedly that you can't help it and elbowing you when a beautiful woman walks by, right? I know JP said it was important to control this 'man gene' and not give into it, but I still object. Just saying there is one and that it is only natural is a basis for defense. Everyone has all kinds of thoughts, some sexual, some just hateful or harmful in other ways. We all need to be responsible for our thoughts and control them. If these thoughts are so pervasive and so hard to control, why do the majority of men manage to do it? Claiming they are natural, and especially claiming that just men have them and have such a hard time controling them is offensive to me. Though the laws are in place, discrimination and harrassment still abound. Expect many more court cases, especially as long as there are people out there telling you that nature is to blame.
By the way, I would be interested to know what other thoughts men are having and how often women think about sex. First though, you would have to find people who would admit to what they think. I bet an honest study would find that women think about sex a lot too, but they don't go around making themselves feel powerful by making others uncomfortable. No doubt that is due more to society pressures than 'nature.'
As long as boys in high school get away with groping girls in school hallways (after all, they are young and it is just nature) you can expect many more court cases on the horizon as these 'boys' enter the work arena.
Nae
I have been reading John Phillips' blog for a couple of weeks now (since someone here recommended it). I am disappointed in his 'man gene' theory. It was bad enough for him to write about it and proclaim it last week, but he is now talking as if it is fact and brought it up again today. Frankly, I think it is bullsoap.
For centuries man claimed it was nature that made women unequal to men. 100 years ago we couldn't even vote. We could not be trusted to since we were emotional hysterical beings who were mostly brainless. Men, after all, were passionate about their beliefs. Women were just hysterical. Men were able to learn mathematics and physical sciences, women weren't smart enough. They should just worry their little heads about keeping hubby happy and being fashion plates. Of course, there was the odd woman here and there who did understand mathematics and physical sciences (since they insisted on learning), but they were rejected by society as abnormal. We were also too delicate to do anything physical - unless you were poor or had a lazy husband. WWII proved that women could handle many 'men' jobs, and once out of the kitchen we refused to go back.
It was also claimed that blacks were by nature inferior beings. It was proved, they claimed, time and time again that slaves were dumb and lazy so therefor all blacks were dumb and lazy. Of course, when some soldiers (white men, again WWII) were captured and forced to do slave labor guess what happened? Yep, they moved as slow as possible and seemed to never understand the instructions. Amazing! African Americans and their supporters marched for their rights in the 50's and 60's and (hoo-ray) got them. They too, will never go back.
Of course both women and African Americans (and other people of color) are still fighting for what is right and fair, because prejudice runs deep and works in subtle and unsubtle ways. But now here is a new one. Though JP declares men should not give into it, sexual harrassment is often due to the 'man gene.' In other words, it is just nature. Give me a break! WHEN ARE MEN GOING TO QUIT BLAMING INEQUALITY AND UNFAIRNESS ON NATURE?
In the dark ages (as little as 50 years ago) your buddies would tell you to control your wife by a smack now and then. (If you don't remember it that way, just watch the movies McLintock or Donovan's Reef with John Wayne, a huge role model in 1963 when these movies were made.) I personally know of a case where a woman literally crawled next door after her phone was ripped out by her son-in-law because the neighbor's son was police officer. (The man hit both his wife and his mother-in-law.) The neighbor called but the cop would not come. They did not get involved in domestic disputes. Fortunately, since that time a woman won her court case against the police in her town (after her husband nearly killed her), and things have changed. Though many women are still killed every year by their lovers, things have improved and more and more women are able to reach out for help and escape their situations. We also now have phsychological help for those men who beat and harm their lovers and children, though only time will tell if it really helps.
I have read about studies that show that men think about sex all day. Thoughts of it repeatedly enter their heads during the course of work and play. But that is natural right? Of course, it has nothing to do with others telling you repeatedly that you can't help it and elbowing you when a beautiful woman walks by, right? I know JP said it was important to control this 'man gene' and not give into it, but I still object. Just saying there is one and that it is only natural is a basis for defense. Everyone has all kinds of thoughts, some sexual, some just hateful or harmful in other ways. We all need to be responsible for our thoughts and control them. If these thoughts are so pervasive and so hard to control, why do the majority of men manage to do it? Claiming they are natural, and especially claiming that just men have them and have such a hard time controling them is offensive to me. Though the laws are in place, discrimination and harrassment still abound. Expect many more court cases, especially as long as there are people out there telling you that nature is to blame.
By the way, I would be interested to know what other thoughts men are having and how often women think about sex. First though, you would have to find people who would admit to what they think. I bet an honest study would find that women think about sex a lot too, but they don't go around making themselves feel powerful by making others uncomfortable. No doubt that is due more to society pressures than 'nature.'
As long as boys in high school get away with groping girls in school hallways (after all, they are young and it is just nature) you can expect many more court cases on the horizon as these 'boys' enter the work arena.
Nae
Comments
I cannot tell you how many times I have heard people say, "sorry, it's just human nature!" No, it isn't. We are humans, not animals, and as such were granted control over our primal instincts and urges.
Unless you want the ape comparisons to continue, stop blaming bad manners on "nature" and take some soaping responsibility for your actions.
And that goes for women as well as men - women are also guilty of playing the "nature" card, and I don't buy it for a second.
Nae, I know you're pissed off, but this actually brightened my day!
One of my favorite quotes that my daughter is sick of hearing is "anyone who is good at making excuses is rarely good for much else."
This is what keeps me from being a democrat. I think Democrats have some good ideas but I cannot accept the way they remove responsibility from individuals. We should all be responsible for our behavior. Period.
I haven't read JP's blog, but I find it interesting that he chose to discuss the male gene in that manner. Curious to hear if he writes a "sister" article regarding the female gene.
We all have differences by nature, that doesn't excuse men from acting like idiots. Guys, to be fair, there are huge numbers of women who use their gender as an excuse for their behavior too.
I think I need to visit JP's blog when I have some time. Perhaps that was his point in writing the article. Nothing like a little sensationalism to grow your audience.
[url]http://hrheroblogs.com/theword/2008/03/17/the-man-gene/[/url]
Last summer there was an online article on either MSN or AOL about how often men and women think about sex. If you googled, you probably could find it, but I'm not taking the time to do it now. I don't remember the numbers but it was something like men = 10 times per hour and women = 7.5 times per hour. Those aren't even close, but the point is both according to the article thought about it quite often, though men a little more often. So, there are bound to be problems.
The problem as I see it, is we tend today to eliminate personal responsibility from our actions. Every teenager who gets arrested for something significant will labeled a "good boy" by those who know him and they will say he is just a product of his environment, as if that lets him off the moral hook. Whatever I do wrong can be blamed somehow on the environment or society. It is "their" fault, whoever their is. So, I can see where the man-gene concept can fit into this same pattern which allows me to neatly duck any personal responsibility by blaming it on my genes and not due to a deficiency in my personal accountability.
How'd I do, Nae?
JP did say that the Man Gene was no excuse, but he also said he felt sorry for those who for whatever reason give in to it. After making the post, I realized I might not be giving his words enough balance and that is why I posted the link.
What really bothers me about the whole thing is the mere concept that it is just nature. I am sure JP believed every word he said. I am also sure that the people of the 19th century believed every word they said on the subject too. The real issue for me though does have to do with responsibility. (You hit the nail on the head.) The excuses are too close to the ones handed out for centuries for me to find them acceptable.
It is not that I cannot see his point, or even sympathize. I am sure my hubby could talk for hours about times when my hormone changes made me more than a little snippy. But that is never an excuse for poor behavior, and more importantly, I do not have a national blog presented by a national organization because I am well-known for my knowledge and experience. Comments such as those made by someone who is acclaimed to be an expert cross the line for me.
I don't blame you or any other man today for what happened in the past. I don't think we can ever make up for past injustices done to the American Indian, African Americans, or anyone who sufferred simply because society or people in power decided they were unworthy of respect or fair treatment. The injustices were done, and those who sufferred are gone. We do, however, have a duty to keep them from continuing to happen. Blaming nature is not the way to go.
Thanks for listening.
PS. You did great Ray.