Son of Thread That Will Never Die



  • Paul must be wearing his spandex superhero outfit again. And it is getting tight and cutting off bloodflow to his brain.

    HRQ, your compensation/benefit package is safe.
  • I thought the worst sidekick job was Jim, from Mutual of Omaha's Wild Kingdom.

    Marlin Perkins would be sitting in the Land Rover describing the action while Jim attempted to staple a tracking device onto the ear of a napping rhinoceros.

    I think sometimes he would honk the Land Rover's horn, just to make it more interesting.
  • Ha ha ha! Thats really funny. Hey, want to be a sidekick?
  • Franko. Please help out Paul. Your multi-syllabic posts would be a good addition to his monosyllabic cacophony.
  • >Please help out Paul.

    I thought Paul had already been outed. With all the spandex and feathers talk, I didn't think anyone here needed my help being outed.

  • Technically, don't you have to be gay to be outed?

    Now there is such a thing as "bi-forum" but I am not one of those. Smace is and a couple others here.

    Not that there is anything wrong with that.

    Hey, a big shout out to our new permanent member, HRQ. She is going to be moving in here for awhile to see what its like to run with the big dogs.

    Welcome HRQ! Our newest member and "March" in our "Son of Thread" pictorial calendar.
  • It's so good to be here. Thanks for the welcome gifts I found on my desk this AM. How did you know I love peanut M&M's? The gel pens with colored sparkly ink and the daisy-shaped sticky notes were nice too - I realize a bit girly for this rough-n-tough thread, but you know I like to be different.

    All I got for a welcome gift from Ray a was this sealed window-envelope. The paper inside looks like check stock, and I can see some zeroes and commas printed on it when I peek inside the window. Odd. He didn't even put happy face stickers on the envelope like he usually does. I'll open it after I finish my M&M's.
  • HRQ it doesn't matter how many zero's or comma's,
    where is the decimal point! Make sure the M&M's are all candy coated. There is a long eared burrowing mammal in the Leporidae family that
    has been producing an M&M look a like
    for years and unsuspecting potential sidekicks have been drawn in by the farce before. Before you go toward the light, put on your
    sun glasses!
  • HRQ, I look forward to your reports as you continue to spy on Paulie.
  • I also look forward to HRQ's involvement and believe she will be able to better serve as Paul's sidekick. However, based on the brief history of this thread, you will need to prepare for borderline vulgarity and anti-whiner proclamations. You cannot allow Paul to soften up on his rough and tumble philosophy for this thread.
    Oh hell, just enjoy yourself!

  • I just returned from attending all three services of the church we attend. I only meant to go to the early service and then sneak back to our local watering hole and watch several NCAA basketball games.

    However, our Pastor's message "Love thy Neighbor" struck at my heart in such a way as to render me immobile. I stayed through all three services AND the "Senior Connection" luncheon.

    It was nearly 2:30 in the afternoon before I was able to move from my seat. Ushers had come along and asked me to move so they could begin setting up for the Monday's bunco night.

    My heart was stricken to the core at my careless and harsh words I have spoken to many a member of this forum. I was convicted and repentant. As I sat in my seat, I made a heartfelt pledge to never again employ sarcasm, cynicism, cruelty, intimidation, slander, and vitriol in my relations with my fellow man.

    What I mean to say is I am a new man. I have left my wicked ways. From this point forward I am testifying that you will only see in me sweetness and light, goodness and mercy.

    To any I have offended I offer up this simple and sincere apology. Furthermore I am confident my actions from this moment forward will vividly illustrate my commitment to be a better man.

  • Paul, I have never perceived any of your comments to be "careless and harsh." There's been plenty of sarcasm, but all in fun, never hurtful, intentional or otherwise. Anyone who has thought you to be hurtful or intimidating has not been paying attention, or their own insecurities are poisoning their views.

    Please carry on, sarcasm and all.
  • Those are kind words, Sister HRQ, and much appreciated. But I must not carry on as I have. My wicked ways are behind me. I am a new man. No more joking. No more sarcasm. No more laughs at Ray's expense.

    I feel liberated. I feel like all the world is new and green and full of joy. I can't wait to start a new week and help my fellow employees solve their human resources dilemmas with renewed conviction and trust.

    Bless you!
  • Nice performance, Brando...

    Get thee behind me, Satan!
  • I am sensing ACLU Frank questions my change of heart. No matter, time will tell.

    By the way HRQ, I just saw the pay discussion thread where you had proposed several very humorous scenarios involving Ray and myself. Though it was not lost on me that you managed to cast me as the malcontent, I still feel your examples were excellent.

    The old Paul would have felt challenged and lashed out but the new Paul welcomes your lively ribaldry and salutes your creativity.

  • My first example involving you, ray and marc was posted well before your post of yesterday afternoon. For the sake of consistency, I kept the same characters in my post today. Being like me, most of our readers have the attention span of a toddler. Changing up the characters would have lost them completely. I knew you could handle it. x:-)
  • I think I'm going to be sick.
  • He's trying to steal me from you. He still hasn't found a sidekick.
  • Well, I ain't giving you up without a fight!
  • Friends, let us not squabble. No one is trying to "steal" anything from anyone. Ha ha! How humorous!

    I do enjoy the banter and repartee of this congenial group.

  • Paul, while I can appreciate
    your going toward the
    light here, I just want to make
    sure you don't turn into the
    Sienfeld episode of "SERENITY
    NOW!!" Turning over a new
    leaf is fine but it is still
    the same leaf and you are
    still Paul to all of us.
  • Hallelujuah Brother!! Praise the Lord and pass the ammunition! That being said, Paul, recognize this thread for what it is: your outlet, you refuge from the cruel whiney world of an evolving HR profession going into the toilet. This is your one method of release that will keep you sane and holy everywhere else. Two slaps across the face, cold water splashed, and a shot of whiskey; that'll bring you back to the straighter and narrower. Your don't have to be bilateral, just balanced (and fair....).

  • Unleash Ann Coulter on him, she'll straighten him out.
  • [font size="1" color="#FF0000"]LAST EDITED ON 03-19-07 AT 08:07PM (CST)[/font][br][br]Oh goodness! What language! "Toilet" and "whiskey" in the same post! Surely the Forum Police will need to take a hard look at that one.

    All your good natured ribbing aside, I am just as committed to be a positive member of this robust forum as ever.

    I'll admit its harder than I thought it would. Does require... a certain... concentration.. Some of you.. don't make it.. easy..

    But the high road is my road and the view is just super!

  • Paul:

    YUCK! The sticky sweet is making my throat close! Snap out of it! PLEASE!!!!

  • Quick, somebody untie his shoelaces. His nose is stuck so high in the air he'll never notice and trip over them falling flat on his face.
  • Children, you mistake my desire to live a more positive life for condescension. Its no cotrivance. This is real. I am not the same Paul I once was.

    Over time, you will come to embrace me as I have embraced this new path. Perhaps, there may even be some among you that will desire to leave their old ways behind as I have.

  • When are you going to change your name back to "Saul", tax collector?
  • Ok, PiCB we all know why you had to sit there in your seat so long. We know you wet your pants and had to wait until they dried....don't give us your "I'm a new man" stuff. We know better.
  • Neither this thread or its papa fit on my screen.
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