Top 10 Dog Complaints about Humans

JudyT929 · June 2005

Ten Dog Peeves About Humans

1. Blaming your farts on me. Not funny. Not funny at
all!

2. Yelling at me for barking. I'M A DOG, YOU IDIOT!
It's what I do!

3. Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check
stuff out.
Exactly whose walk is this anyway?

4. Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose.
Stop it!

5. Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you
know why we
chew your stuff up when you're not home.

6. The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw. You fooled a
dog!
Whoooo-hoooooooo! What a proud moment for the top of
the food
chain!

7. Taking me to the vet for "the big snip," then
acting surprised
when I freak out every time we go back!

8. Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your
guests. Sorry,
but I haven't quite mastered that handshake thing yet.

9. Dog sweaters. Hello??? Haven't you noticed the fur?

10. How you act disgusted when I lick myself. Look, we
both know
the truth. You're just jealous.

Now lay off me on some of these things. We both know
who's boss
here! You don't see me picking up your poop do you?

Gillian3 · June 2005

[font size="1" color="#FF0000"]LAST EDITED ON 06-17-05 AT 12:55PM (CST)[/font][br][br]Someone needs to respond. Arf! Arf! And yes, you are stupid. You didn't train me to bring you shoes. I trained you to give me cheese.

LivindonSouth · June 2005

I see G3's medicinal mary jane has kicked in. x:-)

POPEYE · June 2005

Judy, can you send me the address of the Dog that supplied you this info? I have a few questions for him/her.

HRinNH · June 2005

I'll pass this on to my daughter who just became the proud "mom" to a black lab puppy.

lhill · June 2005

Our dog has two humans who go to work every day and earn money to buy him kibble and munchies. He has us trained to open the door for him when he wants to go outside. He has a dog house complete with carpet. One of his humans provides him with a wading pool of water in the summer, and piles pine needles around his house to keep it warm in winter. When we go on a trip, he gets boarded where another human takes him for walks in the woods and plays with him. Some dumb animal, huh?

Linda

dixied · June 2005

Our dog 'Katie' eats breakfast with my husband each morning. As soon as she hears the electric toothbrush, she is by his side knowing breakfast will be soon. She gets her own box of cerealwhen we buy groceries. Her favorite are the spoon sized Mini Wheats with powered sugar. She gets 4-5 each morning.
They do train us well!

slogan · June 2005

Well this explains a lot. My wife & I went camping this last weekend. Of course we took our two dogs. I had set up the tent, laid down the pads and the sleeping bags. Even threw in the doggie beds. Sometime in the middle of the night, one of our dogs pulled off the blanket over my sleeping bag and made a bed for herself next to my sleeping bag.

If only I had asked ahead of time what she wanted! Now who knows what?

Gillian3 · June 2005

Judy missed one, but the cartoon writer for "Brevity" picked it up. This morning's cartoon shows a guy throwing a stick, while two dogs are by his side. One dog say's "he keeps trying to get rid of that stick, but just to torture him I keep bringing it back".

Top 10 Dog Complaints about Humans

Comments