WHY, WHY, WHY?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Why do they engrave 'one slice' on electric toaster slots? How many pieces of bread do they think people are gonna try to stuff in that slot?

Why is it that no plastic garbage bag will open from the end you first try?

How do those dead bugs get into closed light fixtures?

Since bread is square, why is sandwich meat round?

Why do we wash bath towels? Aren't we clean when we use them? If not then what was the purpose of the bath?

Why do we say 'It's all right' when someone in the supermarket rams our ankle with a shopping cart? It isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That hurt, you stupid idiot'?

In winter, why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

Why do old men wear their pants higher than younger men?

Why are the needy only thought of during the holidays? Aren't they just as needy throughout the rest of the year?

How come we never hear any father-in-law jokes?

Shouldn't all couples forget their mistakes? After all there's no sense in two people remembering the same things.

If money doesn't grow on trees, why do banks have branches?

Why do you have to "put your two cents in" ... but it's only a "penny for your thoughts" Where's that extra penny going to?

Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the clothes you were buried in for eternity?

Why does a round pizza come in a square box?

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

Why are you IN a movie, but you are ON TV?

How come we choose from just two people for President and fifty for Miss America?

Why do doctors leave the room while you change? They're going to see you naked anyway.

Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press 'Ctrl/Alt/Delete' and start all over?

Why is it we can't read a Bible in school, but we can in prison?

If raising children was going to be easy, why did it start with something called 'labor'?

Why is it that brain cells come and brain cells go, but fat cells live forever?


Comments

  • 8 Comments sorted by Votes Date Added
  • >How do those dead bugs get into closed light fixtures?

    I just changed the lightbulbs in my bedroom and asked myself this same question! I never see bugs flying around in my apartment yet lo and behold, they are in the light fixture - ick. I can see them in my bathroom fixture but its one of those fan lights and I can't figure out how to take it down to clean. I never use that light, I use the one over the vanity, and I am simply mystified. I may just have the whole darn thing replaced.
  • I'll take a shot at two of them. The "one slice" on the toaster means that if you're just going to toast one piece of bread, it has to go into a certain slot, or it doesn't work, at least that's how mine works. The old men and pants: I think that their waists aren't in the same place as they used to be.
  • Most likely, one side of the plastic cover pushes in slightly (horizontally) and releases. Look for the side that appears to have little protrusions on it that extend into a slot above or to the side of the cover. Get those little critters out of there!
  • Thanks, I'll try that. I'll have to figure out a way to do it so that I'm not directly under the light though, I don't want little bug carcasses falling on my head. My bathroom is very very small, not lots of room to position my step stool. I don't want to even THINK about trying to balance on the edge of the tub.

    I'm thinking my first choice of having the whole thing replaced might be easier x:D
  • Why do we park in a driveway, and drive in a parkway?
  • Why do we sit up at night and sit down during the day?

    Why does the word "lisp' have an "s" in it? That's cruel.

    Why do people with full immunity need a lawyer.

    Speaking of lawyers, why do they write a 100 page document and then call it a brief?

  • >Why does the word "lisp' have an "s" in it?
    >That's cruel.

    Made me laugh out loud, right before walking in to 7 hours of meetings today. Between "lisp" and "fiigmo", I will have an easy time entertaining myself during the slow parts. x;-)


  • I once heard an old lawyer apologize to the judge for 'not having enough time to write a short brief!' If you think about it, it makes good sense, and is one of the reasons we edit (if we have time)-clear and succinct.


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