Valerie, that is a very odd statement. Several of us told you exactly what we do in our companies. And when I responded, my post was made with complete respect for both the holiday and the law. And as I reread other posters, I would say the same about them.
Spoden: I had intended to not respond further. My deepest apologies to anyone who was truly offended by any remark I made. However, It is wrong of you or anyone else to assume that I took your question or the value of Good Friday lightly. I responded to your question honestly. The remark I made about C&E Christians came straight from the mouth and pulpit of a Southern Baptist Preacher. I was raised in a strict Southern Baptist environment, home and church and am Baptist today. I hold as much reverence for such things as do you or anyone else. I answered someone's comment who said that Good Friday was not widely recognized in the South. I answered another question about the Deep South. A person from the north may not be expected to understand my reverence for The South, nor will I attempt to explain it here; however, I view my Southerness as God given and nobody has a right to judge my feelings for The South or postulate as to what it, or Jesus for that matter, means to me. There was nothing blasphemous in either of my comments, certainly nothing intended. The Forum is not a place for lectures or lessons on Holiness or religion, although we often go there. Your question was about standard HR practice and company policy, not about our personal feelings about Good Friday. My reply was not meant irreverantly and I am sorry that you and the other objector took it that way.
I am rarely if ever one to apologize. I did, however, think it appropriate since I viewed the cricizm somehow as questioning my religious principles and nobody has a right to do that. If the one month visitor will take some time this weekend to go back and read some of my posts she will know a bit more about me and, although her religion prohibits it, perhaps then she can judge me.
And, although you both stand by your earlier posts, somehow I accept your apologies anyway.
Man! This is absolutely perfect! Thanks for the object lesson, everyone. You have just illustrated the point I pound home constantly in my harassment training for employees and supervisors -- INTENT is meaningless, PERCEPTION is everything. I would love to use this exchange as an example when I conduct harassment training next week, if no one has any objections.
Ray, I'm surprised you would even ask the question. You know as well as I do that when it comes to matters of harassment, the disconnect is ALWAYS considered to be on the side of the speaker. The perception is never wrong (or at least that's what the courts lead us to believe). Personally, I think it's flawed logic, but then much about the law is flawed logic - or just plain illogical.
And no royalties are involved... just my heartfelt gratitude for a real life example arising from, of all places, a forum of professional HR people. Shows the employees that we indeed are human, just like they are.
Of course you are right relative to harassment. I was really asking more philosophically. One of my pet peeves is "perception is reality". As you said, flawed logic. An example, you and I often zing each other. If someone perceives we are serious and claims to be offended, are you and I wrong for the jesting? Do we change, or does the offended change?
[font size="1" color="#FF0000"]LAST EDITED ON 04-08-04 AT 11:13AM (CST)[/font][br][br]1. You are not wrong for jesting 2. Neither of you have to change in a win win. .you educate that your zings are in jest and hopefully the persons perception is modified to reality. If not, then their perception is THEIR reality, not yours.
I think it depends upon the audience. When I started working with people from Texas I was horrified when they told me to "get with" someone from IT. In Boston, that is urban slang for having sex. Do they need to change? No. But I understand that they are not telling me to sleep with the IT guy so I can not be offended and if I was, too bad, I can't ask them to change how they say things. In Boston, we use the word retarded to mean everything BUT mentally challanged. We use it to describe things that are silly, inane and stupid. For people, no one uses the word retarded, we say slow. Could that offend someone? Probably. Do we mean to offend the world? Of course not. Thats why we keep Ted Kennedy, he does it for us.
"Get with" is urban slang for having sex??? How interesting.
Re the original post, though: I don't think I have ever seen a company closed on Good Friday. I always thought only the stock market closed on Good Friday.
I did, however, once work for a co. with a devoutly Catholic CEO who paid everyone for the Easter holiday, even though it was a Sunday and everyone was off anyway.
Beagle - "get with" has a similar meaning here in the NW but I think it's used less than it is other places.
Rad - the "get with" thing is so hilarious. I could just picture your jaw dropping when they said that!
The words retarded / slow are used the same way in the NW as they are used where you are (except we don't have the cool accent). However, that is usually only true for people under 40 or so it seems.
True story: when I was 16 I worked at a KMart and was cashiering. It wasn't busy and I was changing the receipt tape in my register. I ended up jamming my machine and had to ask my supervisor to toss me her keys from the other register (about 5 feet away) to open up another part of the machine. She said "what did you do?" and I said "oh the retarded machine jammed". When I turned around to use the key an irate woman was standing at my counter with her adolescent Downs Syndrome daughter next to her. I got the b#tching out of a LIFETIME from that woman. At first, I honestly didn't know what she was talking about. Then her daughter started asking her if she was mad because of her (the daughter). Then it dawned on me. I was so mortified I couldn't even speak. I went into the break room and bawled. It was horrible.
I've worked in Texas and California over the past 20 some odd years and can't remember ever working for a company that was closed on Good Friday. One company gave us 1/2 day for Easter. Course now I work a 4 day week and don't work on any Fridays... We allow anyone who wants to take off for any religious observance be permitted to do so by using their PTO time.
Post No. 32 is worth re-reading. One more thing to consider....There's a minister working in this building. He said to me, "We don't tell people to 'have a happy Easter'". We should encourage people to have a reflective Easter and a meaningful Easter. A Happy Easter is one some might wish their children when they depart the dinner table to hunt Easter eggs". I don't have an opinion on that, just relating what the man said.
I notice that the person who so rudely admonished me for my thoughts and behavior, having no knowledge of either, wished us a Happy Easter.
In my heart, and based on my strong Christian upbringing, I am positive that when she is sitting in the pew on Sunday morning, she will be called upon to apologize to me. I know that to be a pre-ordained fact. I am willing to be patient and will wait until Monday. If she does not, I will send $10 to her church.
Well, I did not get the apology I expected but did get the name and address of the church and have just mailed a ten dollar bill to the church with a recommendation for a sermon. If nothing else, I'm a man of my word.
Don - Interesting. I assume you got the address from Val?
Val - If you're reading this, don't be scared off by anyone's response to your post. You and I may disagree, but you are still welcome on the forum. We need different views on here so we can all grow.
Stay away for a few days and look what happens. At Don's suggestion I re-read Post #32. Speaking for myself only, as I grow older(ouch), I find that I am more open to different points of view on many subjects.
The one thing that I have discovered was that the passion one carries in their heart is genuine. All the rhetoric and grandstanding means nothing. Zip. Nada.
Comments
I am rarely if ever one to apologize. I did, however, think it appropriate since I viewed the cricizm somehow as questioning my religious principles and nobody has a right to do that. If the one month visitor will take some time this weekend to go back and read some of my posts she will know a bit more about me and, although her religion prohibits it, perhaps then she can judge me.
And, although you both stand by your earlier posts, somehow I accept your apologies anyway.
And no royalties are involved... just my heartfelt gratitude for a real life example arising from, of all places, a forum of professional HR people. Shows the employees that we indeed are human, just like they are.
2. Neither of you have to change in a win win. .you educate that your zings are in jest and hopefully the persons perception is modified to reality. If not, then their perception is THEIR reality, not yours.
Edit: I was KIDDING about the royalties Beag.
Re the original post, though: I don't think I have ever seen a company closed on Good Friday. I always thought only the stock market closed on Good Friday.
I did, however, once work for a co. with a devoutly Catholic CEO who paid everyone for the Easter holiday, even though it was a Sunday and everyone was off anyway.
This from the person who wanted to know the whichness of what? x;-)
Rad - the "get with" thing is so hilarious. I could just picture your jaw dropping when they said that!
The words retarded / slow are used the same way in the NW as they are used where you are (except we don't have the cool accent). However, that is usually only true for people under 40 or so it seems.
True story: when I was 16 I worked at a KMart and was cashiering. It wasn't busy and I was changing the receipt tape in my register. I ended up jamming my machine and had to ask my supervisor to toss me her keys from the other register (about 5 feet away) to open up another part of the machine. She said "what did you do?" and I said "oh the retarded machine jammed". When I turned around to use the key an irate woman was standing at my counter with her adolescent Downs Syndrome daughter next to her. I got the b#tching out of a LIFETIME from that woman. At first, I honestly didn't know what she was talking about. Then her daughter started asking her if she was mad because of her (the daughter). Then it dawned on me. I was so mortified I couldn't even speak. I went into the break room and bawled. It was horrible.
I notice that the person who so rudely admonished me for my thoughts and behavior, having no knowledge of either, wished us a Happy Easter.
In my heart, and based on my strong Christian upbringing, I am positive that when she is sitting in the pew on Sunday morning, she will be called upon to apologize to me. I know that to be a pre-ordained fact. I am willing to be patient and will wait until Monday. If she does not, I will send $10 to her church.
Val - If you're reading this, don't be scared off by anyone's response to your post. You and I may disagree, but you are still welcome on the forum. We need different views on here so we can all grow.
The one thing that I have discovered was that the passion one carries in their heart is genuine. All the rhetoric and grandstanding means nothing. Zip. Nada.