Friday Funny
KSR6450
574 Posts
[INDENT][B][B][FONT=Arial][COLOR=#6666cc][COLOR=#6666cc][FONT=Arial]For those who sometimes get flustered by computers, please read on...[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][/B][B][FONT=Arial][COLOR=#6666cc][COLOR=#6666cc][FONT=Arial][B]
[B][B][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous sketch, 'Who's on First?' might have turned out something like this: [/FONT][/FONT][/B][/B][/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][I][FONT=Arial][COLOR=#6666cc][COLOR=#6666cc][FONT=Arial][I]
[B][B][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial][/FONT][/FONT][/B][/B][/I][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/I]
[I][FONT=Arial][COLOR=#6666cc][FONT=Arial][I][B][B][FONT=Arial][COLOR=purple][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT[/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][/B][/I][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/I][FONT=Arial][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial][COLOR=lime]
[/COLOR][B][I][B][I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer. [/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Mac?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Your computer?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Mac?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: What about Windows? [/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Wallpaper.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software. [/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Software for Windows?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Office.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything? [/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT : I just did.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: Y ou just did what?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Recommend something.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: You recommended something ?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Yes.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: For my office?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Yes.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Office.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: Yes, for my office![/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need? [/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Word.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: What word?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Word in Office.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows? [/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue 'W'.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue 'w' if you don't start with some straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with? [/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Money.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Money.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: What's bundled with my computer? [/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Money.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: One copy.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money? [/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT![/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial](A few days later)[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you? [/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Click on 'START'..............[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I][/I][/B][/I][/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT]
[/INDENT]
[CENTER][CENTER][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/CENTER][/CENTER]
[FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial]
[/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT]
[B][B][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]If Bud Abbott and Lou Costello were alive today, their infamous sketch, 'Who's on First?' might have turned out something like this: [/FONT][/FONT][/B][/B][/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][I][FONT=Arial][COLOR=#6666cc][COLOR=#6666cc][FONT=Arial][I]
[B][B][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial][/FONT][/FONT][/B][/B][/I][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT][/I]
[I][FONT=Arial][COLOR=#6666cc][FONT=Arial][I][B][B][FONT=Arial][COLOR=purple][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO CALLS TO BUY A COMPUTER FROM ABBOTT[/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/B][/B][/I][/FONT][/COLOR][/FONT][/I][FONT=Arial][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial][COLOR=lime]
[/COLOR][B][I][B][I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer. [/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Mac?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: No, the name's Lou.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Your computer?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Mac?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: I told you, my name's Lou.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: What about Windows? [/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: Why? Will it get stuffy in here?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Do you want a computer with Windows?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Wallpaper.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software. [/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Software for Windows?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Office.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything? [/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT : I just did.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: Y ou just did what?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Recommend something.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: You recommended something ?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Yes.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: For my office?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Yes.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: OK, what did you recommend for my office?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Office.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: Yes, for my office![/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: I recommend Office with Windows.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need? [/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Word.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: What word?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Word in Office.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: The only word in office is office.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: The Word in Office for Windows.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: Which word in office for windows? [/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: The Word you get when you click the blue 'W'.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: I'm going to click your blue 'w' if you don't start with some straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with? [/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Money.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: That's right. What do you have?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Money.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: I need money to track my money?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: It comes bundled with your computer.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: What's bundled with my computer? [/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Money.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: Money comes with my computer?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Yes. No extra charge.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: One copy.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: Isn't it illegal to copy money? [/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: They can give you a license to copy money?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Why not? THEY OWN IT![/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial](A few days later)[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Super Duper computer store. Can I help you? [/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]COSTELLO: How do I turn my computer off?[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I]
[I][I][FONT=Arial][FONT=Arial]ABBOTT: Click on 'START'..............[/FONT][/FONT][/I][/I][/I][/B][/I][/B][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/FONT]
[/INDENT]
[CENTER][CENTER][FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial][/FONT][/COLOR][/COLOR][/SIZE][/FONT][/CENTER][/CENTER]
[FONT=Arial][SIZE=3][COLOR=black][COLOR=black][FONT=Arial]
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Comments
Thanks for the chuckle.
Sharon