Not Thanksgiving jokes

1. I rear-ended another car this morning. I tell you, I knew right then and there that it was going to be a really bad day.
The driver got out of the other car, and wouldn't you know it!
He was a dwarf!! He looked up at me and said, "I am 'Not Happy.'
So I said, "Well, then, which one are you?"

And, that's how the fight started.

2. Two elderly men were sunning themselves on a Miami Beach when they started a friendly conversation.
"I was able to move here to retire in Miami after my business burned to the ground," the one man said. "The insurance payment sure came in handy."
The other replied, "I'm here living from an insurance claim when my factory was flooded out."
The first man pondered for a few seconds and then asked, "How do you start a flood?"

HAVE A WONDERFUL AND THANK FULL HOLIDAY!!

Comments

  • 4 Comments sorted by Votes Date Added
  • I love #1. I may have posted this before, but my boss says "I am NOT HAPPY" all the time, to demonstrate that she is, in fact, not happy.

    I forwarded the joke to her and said "now I know how to respond when you say that."

    She wrote back "Nice, coming from the HR Director." x}>
  • I love that joke.

    Ok, here is a problem I am having on a serious note. You all know the show "The Office". Great show. Love the show to death. Can't say enough good things about that show.

    Except... if you watch it for any length of time, the phrase "thats what she said" begins popping into your head in very innappropriate situations.

    I even confided in an office buddy of mine who is also a young married male and big fan of the show. He is pretty conservative so I was suprised when he said that he too was finding the phrase come to mind.

    So far I haven't said it out loud but I am worried that it might slip out.

  • I must be the one person in the country who has never watched that show. In fact the only "grown up" TV that I make an effort to watch is American Idol. Oh, and any of the "I love the (70's, 80's, 90's)" series on VH1.


  • Nope, you are not the only one that has never watched it but then I have never watched American Idol either.
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