Women/Men in the Shower
System
5,885 Posts
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN:
Take off clothing and place in the sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. Walk to the bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg lifts, etc. Get in shower. Use face-cloth, arm-cloth, leg-cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. Wash hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. Wash hair again to make sure its clean. Condition hair with grapefruit mint conditionoer enhanced with real passionfruit. Wash face with crushed appricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. Rinse conditoner off hair. Shave armpits and legs. Turn off shower. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex. Get out of shower and stand on bathmat. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbant towel. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake your wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound. Look at manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your ass. Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. Hock up a loogie and shoo it down the drain with your toe. Spend majority of time wahsing privates and surrounding area. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. Wash your hair. Make a shampoo Mohawk. Pee. Rinse off and get out of shower. Avoid bathmat. Dry off forearms and butt only. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. Admire weiner size in mirror again. Shake it to watch water fly off. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound agian. Throw wet towel on bed.
Truth is funnier than fiction...Have a great day and, 'woo-woo' !!!
Take off clothing and place in the sectioned laundry hamper according to lights and darks. Walk to the bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do more sit-ups/leg lifts, etc. Get in shower. Use face-cloth, arm-cloth, leg-cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and pumice stone. Wash hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added vitamins. Wash hair again to make sure its clean. Condition hair with grapefruit mint conditionoer enhanced with real passionfruit. Wash face with crushed appricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until red. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. Rinse conditoner off hair. Shave armpits and legs. Turn off shower. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots with Tilex. Get out of shower and stand on bathmat. Dry with towel the size of a small country. Wrap hair in super absorbant towel. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN:
Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them in a pile. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way, shake your wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound. Look at manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your wiener and scratch your ass. Get in the shower. Wash your face. Wash your armpits. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. Hock up a loogie and shoo it down the drain with your toe. Spend majority of time wahsing privates and surrounding area. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on the soap. Wash your hair. Make a shampoo Mohawk. Pee. Rinse off and get out of shower. Avoid bathmat. Dry off forearms and butt only. Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time. Admire weiner size in mirror again. Shake it to watch water fly off. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. Return to bedroom with towel around waist. If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the 'woo-woo' sound agian. Throw wet towel on bed.
Truth is funnier than fiction...Have a great day and, 'woo-woo' !!!
Comments
How true...how true!
James Sokolowski
HRhero.com
Larry the cable guy would've added a Buffalo Bill tuck and dance to the act...GIT-R-DONE!
>Truth is funnier than fiction...
LOL...You said it!