Keeping Sanity in the work place

Page yourself over the intercom. (Don't disguise your voice.)

Find out where your boss shops, and buy exactly the same outfits.

Always wear them one day after your boss does. (This is especially effective if your boss is a different gender than you are.)

Make up nicknames for all your coworkers and refer to them only by these names. "That's a good point, Sparky." "No, I'm sorry. I'm going to have to disagree with you there, Chachi."

Send email to the rest of the company telling them what you're doing. For example "If anyone needs me, I'll be in the bathroom."

Send e-mail messages saying free pizza, free donuts etc... in the lunchroom, when people complain that there was none... Just lean back, pat your stomach, and say, "Oh you've got to be faster than that."

Insist that your e-mail address be "zena_goddess_of_fire@companyname.com"

Every time someone asks you to do something, ask them if they want fries with that.

Send email to yourself engaging yourself in an intelligent debate about the direction of one of your company's products. Forward the mail to a co-worker and ask her to settle the disagreement.

Put your garbage can on your desk. Label it "IN."

Put decaf in the coffeemaker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

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