Can you top this?
Leslie
1,729 Posts
[font size="1" color="#FF0000"]LAST EDITED ON 07-15-04 AT 05:44PM (CST)[/font][br][br]This is for you mcmel, Hatchetman, Gillian3, et al, who we may not be hearing from come Monday. Pipe in while you can!
Two things you need to know first...
My SO wears a mariner's crucifix:
[url]http://www.4jewelrylovers.com/ImagesLarge/440147.jpg[/url]
He's 6'1", I'm 5'3".
So, last night we're getting ready for bed and he has his shirt off. I walked by him and he grabs me for a quick hug. My head is planted in his chest and when I step back I realize I’m hooked to the anchor end of his crucifix....in my right nostril! x:o
I jerk, thinking it will just break loose - instead it digs in deeper. x:o x:o
I’m yelling and trying not to move, he’s cursing, and peering down between my nostril and his chain trying to figure out how to detach me from the crucifix. Finally, he gets it out and I think I’m heading to the hospital for stitches because now I have a tear in my nose.
But no - it did not tear...it went all the way through. His crucifix has effectively pierced my nose! x:o x:o x:o
It is red, slightly bruised, terribly sore and I’m wondering if I shouldn’t just put a hoop in it and go with the flow.
Two things you need to know first...
My SO wears a mariner's crucifix:
[url]http://www.4jewelrylovers.com/ImagesLarge/440147.jpg[/url]
He's 6'1", I'm 5'3".
So, last night we're getting ready for bed and he has his shirt off. I walked by him and he grabs me for a quick hug. My head is planted in his chest and when I step back I realize I’m hooked to the anchor end of his crucifix....in my right nostril! x:o
I jerk, thinking it will just break loose - instead it digs in deeper. x:o x:o
I’m yelling and trying not to move, he’s cursing, and peering down between my nostril and his chain trying to figure out how to detach me from the crucifix. Finally, he gets it out and I think I’m heading to the hospital for stitches because now I have a tear in my nose.
But no - it did not tear...it went all the way through. His crucifix has effectively pierced my nose! x:o x:o x:o
It is red, slightly bruised, terribly sore and I’m wondering if I shouldn’t just put a hoop in it and go with the flow.
Comments
The moral of this story is: Never hug a naked man who's wearing a mariner's cross. If you sleep with him, make damned sure he puts it on the bedside table.
I see you didn't include me on the list but wanted to respond anyway, and I know you aren't married, unlike some on your list. x:-)
Of course, everyone is welcome to read and respond to my tale of woe.
And Sonny, I know it's funny - my nose just hurts when I laugh.
Chari
[email]calter@iopener.net[/email]
I have some Spongebob Squarepants bandaids you can use. They looked positively smashing on my two year old's forehead last week.
Does make an interesting mental image, though.
About the bandaids - if you are stuck with a facial injury which people are likely to notice anyway, you might as well dress it up a bit, right? I never wear the beige ones, although I once used facial tissue and scotch tape to bandage a particularly nasty papercut.
Probably as painful as when my daughter bit me while I was nursing her...she's 21 and I can still remember the pain!
I've been thinking about getting an extra piercing in one ear, so just one question: Is your SO's chest free this weekend? I swear, I only want him for his mariner's crucifix. I have my own SO, but he only has a measly St. Christopher medal with no sharp points. I'll send your guy right back.
-- Whirrrrrlwind
My eyes were watering just thinking about it. (From pain, not laughter).
My friend Irene, for no apparent reason, came up to me and grabbed the zipper at the bottom and ZIPPED it all the way to the top with great force.
I was caught off guard and as I looked down to see what she was doing my lower lip met the zipper coming up and my lip got effectively zipped into the jacket.
The next few seconds are fuzzy but somehow my lip became disengaged. Irene apologized profusely.
Probably doesn't top a spontaneous nose piercing but I get credit for trying.
Another interesting bit about the finger episode: I was working in my shop 70 yards away from the house, and couldn't find anything to wrap around my hand, so I just held the finger tightly with the other hand, but found that when I got to the house, I couldn't very well open the door. Our teenage daughter was in the house, in view, on the phone, so I just kicked on the door and she looked over at me without being able to see my hands, and decided to ignore me. I kicked again, and she gave me one of those looks that only a teenager can give: Can't you see I'm on the phone here? So, I had to let go of the finger and open the door myself. I have to admit that she did feel bad after seeing what my problem was.
I can smile about it now.
FRANKS AND BEANS!!!
That always keeps the staff wondering about you when you are laughing by yourself!
Have a good weekend, everyone!
But if you want to spurt milk out your nose from laughing, I suggest you take in Don's post about the carb-free hot dog. It's a definite crowd pleaser and I had a hard time working after reading it! x:-)