Aunt Betty
Whirlwind
882 Posts
I don't think I've seen this joke posted yet....
A teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment:
Get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it.
The next day the kids came back and one by one began to tell their stories.
Ashley said, "My father's a farmer and we have a lot of egg-laying hens.
One time we were taking our eggs to market in a basket on the front seat of
the pickup. We hit a bump in the road and all
the eggs went flying and broke and made a mess."
"And what's the moral of the story?" asked the teacher.
"Don't put all your eggs in one basket!" Ashley said.
"Very good," said the teacher.
Next, Sarah raised her hand and said, "Our family are farmers, too. But we
raise chickens for the meat market. We had a dozen eggs one time, but when
they hatched we only got ten live chicks and the moral to this story is,
"Don't count your chickens until they're hatched."
"That was a fine story, Sarah. Michael, do you have a story to share?"
Little Michael, looking pensive, said, "Yes, ma'am You see, my daddy told me
this story about my Aunt Betty. Aunt Betty was a flight engineer during
Desert Storm. On one mission her plane got hit. She had to bail out over
enemy territory. All she had was a bottle of
whiskey, a machine gun and a machete."
The teacher, looking startled at the tone of the story, asked Michael what
happened next.
"Well," he said, "she drank the whiskey on the way down so it wouldn't
break, and then she landed right in the middle of 100 enemy troops. She
killed 70 of them with the machine gun until she ran out of bullets, then
she killed 20 more with the machete till the blade broke, and then she
killed the last ten with her bare hands."
"Good heavens," said the horrified teacher..."What kind of moral did your
daddy tell you from that horrible story?"
"Stay the hell away from Aunt Betty when she's been drinking".
A teacher gave her fifth grade class an assignment:
Get their parents to tell them a story with a moral at the end of it.
The next day the kids came back and one by one began to tell their stories.
Ashley said, "My father's a farmer and we have a lot of egg-laying hens.
One time we were taking our eggs to market in a basket on the front seat of
the pickup. We hit a bump in the road and all
the eggs went flying and broke and made a mess."
"And what's the moral of the story?" asked the teacher.
"Don't put all your eggs in one basket!" Ashley said.
"Very good," said the teacher.
Next, Sarah raised her hand and said, "Our family are farmers, too. But we
raise chickens for the meat market. We had a dozen eggs one time, but when
they hatched we only got ten live chicks and the moral to this story is,
"Don't count your chickens until they're hatched."
"That was a fine story, Sarah. Michael, do you have a story to share?"
Little Michael, looking pensive, said, "Yes, ma'am You see, my daddy told me
this story about my Aunt Betty. Aunt Betty was a flight engineer during
Desert Storm. On one mission her plane got hit. She had to bail out over
enemy territory. All she had was a bottle of
whiskey, a machine gun and a machete."
The teacher, looking startled at the tone of the story, asked Michael what
happened next.
"Well," he said, "she drank the whiskey on the way down so it wouldn't
break, and then she landed right in the middle of 100 enemy troops. She
killed 70 of them with the machine gun until she ran out of bullets, then
she killed 20 more with the machete till the blade broke, and then she
killed the last ten with her bare hands."
"Good heavens," said the horrified teacher..."What kind of moral did your
daddy tell you from that horrible story?"
"Stay the hell away from Aunt Betty when she's been drinking".
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