Meeting No No's

mwild31

I just attended a meeting in which three people wanted to talk at the same time (not me) or tried to talk over each other, someone passed some gas (cause is sure smelled) & at one point the conversation drifted off into what machinery/tools to buy for our woodshop (very exciting stuff xflash ) - say hello to our systems team meeting consisting of 3 managers and approximately 4 other employees. The meeting just ended, it's 4:00 p.m. and I'm drinking coffee 'cause the darn meeting zapped me of my energy & almost my will to live.

What are your pet peeves in a meeting, crazy stories, etc. in regards to either how to conduct a meeting or what you expect as a participant? On someone's list, I xpray it must say, "Thou shall not put your attendees to sleep or cause asphyxiation." x;-)

marc

I like the take on meetings illustrated in many of the Dilbert cartoons. Sounds like the one you just went through would be a classic.

We had a consultant come in who brought some sort of bean bag toy to the meeting and suggested no one talk without the bean bag. It was fun for awhile, but really not very practical.

rad

Lots of our meetings include people from different parts of the US so time is ALWAYS wasted talking about the weather. Right now its below zero. No doubt that every conference call will include discussion on how cold it is here, how warm it is somewhere else, how cold it was when so and so went skiing in Colorado, etc. That makes me crazy. Its cold, we still have work to do, lets move on...

ray a

With our old regime, whoever spoke the loudest in the staff meetings won. Of course that would often lead to outright shouting matches. Our current VP has gotten into the habit of holding staff meetings from 4 to 6PM after we finish our normal daily business. Normally, I'm outta here between 4 and 4:30.

Rad, do your coworkers realize you have a psychopathic side?

rad

I think they're beginning to catch on.

ritaanz

I worked for a company that was purchased by an Israeli firm. The CEO would come to the US frequently. EVERY time he visited there was the dreaded Staff Meeting. These meetings had no agenda. He would ask a question and not identify anyone in particular to answer. You quickly learned that he expected an immediate answer and the more finger pointing the better. You did not sleep in these meetings. It was like he threw a piece of red meat on the table to watch us fight over it. The quiet ones were eventually eliminated.

ray a

So Rita, did you succeed at that company or were you one of the quiet ones?

ritaanz

Toot, what do you think?

ray a

I'm sure you were highly successful without having to lower yourself to play any childish games and always maintained your composure. How am I doing?

ritaanz

Ha,ha,ha,ha,ha. Although the CEO spoke excellent English, he did not have a grasp of our slang expressions. At one meeting, he made a statement that "over time I would come to see and agree with his opinion". My responce was "Fat chance!" He smiled. You see, he interpreted fat as meaning broad/great and underdstood my remark as being positive. Maintain composure?? You either protected your turf or be run over.

FHR

I used to work with a finance manager who would bring up a subject and then repeat it at least 20 times using a slight variation in vocabulary. You could repeat it back to him as in " I got it M you mean....." and he'd say "yes, but blah, blah, blah" etc. In meetings there was no stopping him but in hallways or on the floor we had a practice of just walking away. He didn't seem to mind. I imagine he was accustomed to it by that time in his life

Whatever

Hate to lower the high quality of the responses, but my number one no-no is picking your nose (I was at a meeting a few weeks ago where this happened)particularly when it is a business lunch.

Human Resources Manager

EEEEEEEWWWWW! I hope the "picker" wasn't seated directly across from you!

rad

Another thing I hate is when meetings are filled with business-isms, so much so that an outsider would have no idea what anyone was talking about. You know like "lets take those numbers and true them up" What?!?!?! Oh, you want me to validate them against the projections? Then say so!

There was a Dilbert column about this a few months ago and it was hilarious. My old boss used to use them for everything thinking they made her sound savvy but she used the terms all wrong so no one ever knew what the heck she was talking about.

mwild31

Usually our meetings are very informative & we stick to the rule of never meet without a decision/action being made. Yesterday's meeting xpray was just strange.

celeste

During our staff meeting last week, we were discussing an issue with a machine and the part. One of the engineers had an idea that everyone agreed was a good one. Our Quality Mgr. said (jokingly) that is a good idea...you really do walk on water and the engineer got upset and flipped him off right there. The best part is that this guy just started here 12/01/03. Yes, he was talked to about it. Weird or what???

HRQ

[font size="1" color="#FF0000"]LAST EDITED ON 01-15-04 AT 02:08PM (CST)[/font][br][br]"we were discussing an issue with a machine and the part."

Your machines are pretty advanced, celeste! x;-) (Just giving you a hard time...)

My pet peeves?

People who interrupt. I'm not talking about at the end of a sentence or when the conversation is drifting off, I'm talking about when I'm in the middle of making a point and someone starts in with their own. I just give 'em the eye and keep talking.

People who form their own side-bars during meetings. I just stop talking and stare at them 'til they notice. Then I continue where I left off.

mwild31

oooooo - good one HRQ - I hate sidebars as well.

sonny

At my former place of employment, one member of our management team would always bring not related work meetings and work on stuff not related to the meeting. Drove me nuts. Also hated when everyone would agree in the meeting, walk out the door and start complaining. And of course what has already been noted here. We instituted Meeting Management and things got much better. Every meeting had a Purpose, Lengthn, Agenda and Next steps. Out of control meetings make me crazy (ier)

Dan

The productivity of the meeting is important. Years ago I work for an HR manager who had regularly scheduled staff meetings that lasted 3 to 4 hours. The information covered in these marathon meetings could have been covered in an hour.