Healed

An Irishman in a wheel chair entered a restaurant one afternoon and asked
the waitress for a cup of coffee. The Irishman looked across the
restaurant and asked, "Is that Jesus sitting over there?". The waitress
nodded yes, so the Irishman told her to give Jesus a cup of coffee on
him.

The next patron to come in was an Englishman with a hunched back. He
shuffled over to a booth, painfully sat down, and asked the waitress for
a cup of tea. He also glanced across the restaurant and asked, "Is that
Jesus over there?," The waitress nodded, so the Englishman said to give
Jesus a cup of tea, my treat.

The third person to come into the restaurant was a redneck on crutches.
He hobbled over to a booth, sat down and hollered

"Hey there sweet thang, how's about getting me a cold glass of Coke!" He
too, looked across the restaurant and asked, "Is that God's boy over
there?" The waitress nodded, so the redneck said to give Jesus a cold
glass of Coke, on my bill.

As Jesus got up to leave, he passed by the Irishman touched him and
said,"For your kindness, you are healed."

The Irishman felt the strength come back to his legs, got up, and danced
a jig out the door. Jesus also passed by the Englishman, touched him and
said, for your kindness, you are healed."

The Englishman felt his back straightening up and he raised up his hands,
praised the Lord and did a series of back flips out the door.

Then Jesus walked toward the redneck. The Redneck jumped up and yelled,
"Don't touch me.....I'm drawing disability!!!!!!!!"


Comments

  • 3 Comments sorted by Votes Date Added
  • Thanks for the laugh, Leslie! x:-)

    Now here's one for you:

    A priest, a rabbi and a lawyer were shipwrecked on a small island about a mile from the mainland. Their boat was wrecked so their only option was to swim through shark-infested waters toward the shore.

    The priest was confident he could make the journey safely. As he jumped in, the sharks descended on him at once and he had to swim frantically back to the little island, battered but alive.

    The rabbi, too, decided to give it a try and made it a bit further than the priest before the sharks pounced on him and he had to beat them off as he swam back to the island.

    They begged the lawyer not to attempt the crossing, but he would not hear of it. As he dove into the water and began to swim out to sea, the sharks parted on either side, creating a gauntlet through which the lawyer swam unmolested. When he reached the mainland, he called back to the priest and the rabbi that he would send a boat.

    The rabbi shouted back, "How come the sharks didn't attack you?"

    The lawyer replied, "Professional courtesy!"
  • What a kick! My brother-in-law will love it. He's a lawyer and usually beats me to the punch line every time. I think he has heard them all!
  • If I can find it, I'll pass on to you another good one -- it's called "A Law to Regulate the Hunting and Harvesting of Attorneys." It's really funny.
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