What are your rules?

Paul in Cannon Beach

Recently I attended a discussion of "generational differences" facilitated by one of our board members. We spent a lot of time talking about how each generation defines concepts like truth, honest, etc differently. In other words, the person you are communicating with may have some very different basic assumptions which will often lead to misunderstanding and frustration.

Our faciliator recommended that we create our "rules for communication". Its an intriguing concept. Dusty Baker, manager of the Chicago Cubs, has his "Five Rules" which include:
1. Don't lie to me.
2. Give me all you got.
3. Be on time.
4. Don't make the same mistake twice.
5. If you have a problem with me, come to me not ESPN.

I took a shot at creating my list:

1. I can't solve problems I don't know about.
2. Respect, trust, and honesty work both ways.
3. Punish insubordination. Mentor immaturity.
4. Help me understand.
5. Never forget the mission.

This list is still a work in progress. I am not sure how to communicate the list to others. I was curious to know if anyone else has taken the time to actually write down their guidelines or expectation for communication.

Dutch2

Paul... a great idea and good timing for me. We recently ID'ed a group of future leaders of our company and arranged for them to take one afternoon every month to attend a "Leadership" class at one of the local Colleges. As most everyone with any experience in HR could have guessed... so far their number one area that we need to address as a company is communication. I know the professor conducting this class and I plan on sharing your message with him to see if it can be included in one of the classes.
Thanks,
Dutch2

Whirlwind

My list, no matter how much I try to make it have multiple items, keeps coming back to just one thing:

1. I will try my best to treat you the way I wanted to be treated in terms of: Trust, honesty, respect, kindness, and accountability. But if you repeatedly demonstrate that you can't hold up your end of the deal, then the "trust" part is pretty well shot.

Interesting exercise; thanks, Paul.

Ww.

Paul in Cannon Beach

WW, that's one long rule. Sounds like there was some history that went into it as well.

I can think of a lot of times when some misunderstandings could have been avoided if co-workers knew what I expected in terms of communication.

Perhaps I may give new ee's my business card with my rules written on the back. There is something kind of pretentious about that however.

Maybe we are all conditioned to not expect anyone to really care how we like to be treated or what we expect from others.

Whirlwind

>WW, that's one long rule. Sounds like there was
>some history that went into it as well.
>

I work with some people that are....accountability-challenged. But perhaps that's just my perception resulting from the fact that we're not communicating in a truly open, honest way. Maybe I'll have a second rule after all:

2. Let's commit to being completely candid in our communication, even if it means that we will sometimes have spirited arguments and respectful conflict.

Sadly, many of us shrink from that kind of vulnerability. Even in our personal lives, our communications get very layered and obfuscated with all kinds of defenses. And I think that's even more the case in a work environment.

ray a

A couple years ago we had a campaign to improve communication. The main point was *how* we communicated with each other. We brainstormed concepts that we believed were important including, passion, commitment, pride, integrity, and respect and used those to come up with a values statement that was the basis for our program.

Face each challenge with passion,
Commit ourselves with pride,
Act with integrity and respect.

WT

I will give you one. A mistake or work not completed is simply an issue to be corrected unless it is hidden, lied about or becomes habitual.

Paul in Cannon Beach

WT - Thats a good one. I totally agree. Mistakes are often made by people who are trying something new and that should not be discouraged.

LarryC

1. Never take life seriously. It's too important.

2. Be honest to a fault.

3. Stretch.

4. Sacrifice.

5. Always replace the divot and never drop the
flag.