MOST STUPID POLICIES

Don D

Let's list a few of our most stupid policies or those of others of which we are aware. I'll start with a policy of M. Lee Smith that Sokolowski posted over on the FMLA thread.

That policy is that 'You are not allowed to telecommute, while working here, unless you have already made childcare arrangements for your minor children'. How indefensible, bizarre and Machiavellian is that? But, rather than discuss that policy, what are some of yours?

irenesmsaclaims

How about mandatory offsite parking that took 20 minutes each way, and no place onsite to eat but you had to leave your desk for lunch?

Down_the_Middle

I saw a Wellness policy the other day that encouraged people to remember that the sun provided Vitamins D & K, yet offered wellness dollars for spray tanning to avoid the sun's damaging rays; or the policy that required all employees to have worked a minimum of 3 hrs per month between the hours of 6 - 9pm and yet the bldg was closed at 6pm to any and all employees.

mushroomHR

Our "no smoking" policy. We are a "non-smoking facility" yet we have designated smoking areas within the building and people still smoke in the restrooms while the owners look the other way. Oh yes, smoking is only allowed during breaks and lunches--except when the president needs a cigarette--then he can go to one of the designated smoking areas in our non-smoking facility and smoke. :-?

System

Don,

I think our telecommuting policy is pretty un-stupid. We've had a good number of employees and applicants who wanted to telecommute while being the sole caregiver for a three-month-old baby. I can tell you from personal experience that taking care of a baby is a hectic and relentless job (tho much more rewarding than any other job). Doing eight hours of quality work while watching a baby would require an extraordinary, superhuman effort.

Would you let one of your employees set up a playpen in her office and bring her kid to work 40 hours a week? Would she give you eight hours of quality work? No way.

James Sokolowski
HRhero.com

Don D

[font size="1" color="#FF0000"]LAST EDITED ON 12-13-04 AT 01:14PM (CST)[/font][br][br]I guess the only thing worse than a stupid policy is defending one. James, it is a violation of federal law to make FMLA conditional on some off the wall requirement such as the one you state. And if one of your employee needs to take FMLA and can show that your policy somehow discriminates against them by precluding something ordinarily available to others, such as telecommuting, thus continuing their pay, I would think someone in the M Lee Smith HR department might find themselves in a bit of a bind with a federal auditor.

I gave a somewhat related example of a caregiver in the home of a demented adult needing a break for a week or two and an employee requesting to telecommute to provide that break. How do you reckon your policy might view that?

Now if you want to talk about trying to work while distracted, you will have to also outlaw miniskirts and wonderbras.

I've assisted in the raising of several children and agree with your assessment otherwise.

System

Don,

I think we're talking about two different things. I'm talking about people who AREN'T on FMLA leave. They just want to work from home to be closer to their kids.

Even if it were FMLA leave, our policy wouldn't be a problem because you can't be on the clock and on leave at the same exact moment. Even with intermittent or reduced-hour leave, the ee has to identify the time they are working and the time they're on leave.

James Sokolowski
HRhero.com

Whatever

>>
>Would you let one of your employees set up a
>playpen in her office and bring her kid to work
>40 hours a week? Would she give you eight hours
>of quality work? No way.
>
>James Sokolowski
>HRhero.com


Would you let one of your employees set up a playpen in HIS office and bring HIS kid to work 40 hours a week? Would HE give you eight hours of quality work? No way.

Fair's fair. x:D

System

>>
>Would you let one of your employees set up a
>playpen in HIS office and bring HIS kid to work
>40 hours a week? Would HE give you eight hours
>of quality work? No way.
>
>Fair's fair. x:D

Whatever: It's different for men. If a man brings a baby into the office, women swoop in from all directions and offer to watch the baby or play with her for a few hours.... Either it's maternal instincts gone wild, or they assume that men can't take care of a baby -- you decide. x:P

James Sokolowski
HRhero.com

Balloonman1

James is right, bring a cute baby with you as a guy, and it's like a chick magnet!!!!!!! Yeah babeeeeeee. Good way to get some dates in the office.........

Seriously...........relax and all take a deep breath.

I will not allow people to bring their kids into the office due to lack of a sitter just for the reasons James listed.

Don, his reasoning is sound........I don't know how long you stayed home with the kids instead of working, but, you are no where near as productive with those little tricycle engines around. So the need for a telecommuting person to be fully engaged is rational......

Geez I missed all the fun today. Oh four days till Disney World, 28 days until no more attendance issues, no terminations, no discipline......oh sorry I digress.....
My $0.02 worth,
DJ The Balloonman

Don D

You're probably right DJ. We could stand to listen to a balloon twister and a guy with a journalism degree. Enjoy your vacation. x:-)

SMace

I guess the alternative is to listen to someone that puts bottles on trees. :-?

Don D

Or someone who does little other than hide in the bushes and shoot spitballs out of a drinking straw. x:-)

SMace

You missed my point. Read again and really think hard. x:-8

National Guard

I have to disagree with James and Balloonman. So, your saying that stay-at-home moms are not productive? So, that's why my house is never clean? I can only do one thing at a time - take care of the kid(s). Only office people can multi-task? Especially smokers, and those who eat lunch at their desk (work through lunchk), yea, those lunch workers are doing such quality work!th-down

Ethel

Actually, I think setting policies that appear to be outlandish comes from a feeling of FRUSTRATION and trying to address a specific problem with too wide a policy!! Now-a-days, the employer has many less rights than the the thousands of hr laws give employees.

Sometimes it appears that the employer is only left with the right to provide paychecks and benefits and the employees will let their employer know under what conditions -- i.e. prefer to work from home, prefer to come in at a different time than the reg. business hours; etc., etc., etc.

True -- I am an employee also. But, as a "trustee" in the employment Nut House, I see both sides and employee's what have you done for me lately attitude is causing our upper manageent (who are also employees) to be leary and cautious.

OK, I'm off the soap box -- but it did feel good to vent.

LisaMN2

Back to the original question. We have two here that are my all time favorites. Luckily neither are HR policies.

One is from our Nutrition Services department. The "Potluck Policy" requires any work group, department or other group to notify the appropriate cafeteria personnel of the day and time their potluck is scheduled so that food production may be adjusted.

The other is the "Candle Lighting Policy". It governs the size, shape and method of display of candles utilized during memorial services.

Talk about having way too much time on your hands.....

mwild31

[font size="1" color="#FF0000"]LAST EDITED ON 12-14-04 AT 06:46PM (CST)[/font][br][br]LisaMN2 - those are some doozies. x:7

Please tell me you have 2,000 or more employees assigned to your organization & not just around 250-500. For some reason, I can only think of ways to justify a "Candle Lighting Policy" if there are just too many people around... x:D

We've had a few doozies as well. From the old "What the Heck?" files:

Trainer Feedback: Is given to you to help you improve and therefore get future raises. It is your responsibility to receive feedback positively so that you encourage more feedback.

Personal problems: If something is going on outside of work, and is affecting work, please let us know that something is going on, and when you'll be back to normal. It is none of our business what the issue is.

Drugs and alcohol: Consumption before or during work is prohibited. If you get caught, you will be terminated immediately. Our medical plan may pay for some benefits, which can help substance abusers.

Snow schedule: You are expected to plan alternate transportation routes so you can safely get to work. (This makes the "What the Heck?" file because we get, seriously, maybe 6 inches of snow & that's a really bad snowstorm!)

TN HR

I have to agree with most. However, the most idiotic one that comes to mind came from a former employer who required it's sales force, in writing, to do certain things like:

-Only drive American-made 4-door sedans wihtout leather or sunroofs.

-Never wear a double breasted suit.

-The only acceptable ties were from either Brooks Brothers or Tommy Hilfiger (Premium Label ONLY, not cheap Tommy stuff).

-When ordering drinks in the presence of a client ALWAYS demand top shelf brands. A Vodka Martini made with anything less than Grey Goose or Ketl One is unacceptable.

I swear to the above policies. I used to laugh so hard at the sales people, as they got out of their base model Ford Taurus wearing Brooks Brothers suits and Johnston and Murphy shoes acting like they were high rollers.

Gene

Crout

But they were right...you CAN'T make a decent martini without Grey Goose. I thought this was for stupid policies?

TN HR

Heh, heh.....You got me Crout!

Don D

I just remembered one of the policies I was subjected to when I first went to work for the State. "Gentlemen are expected to wear white dress shirts and ties and have a coat available for meetings as appropriate." This was also before women were allowed to wear anything other than skirts, as pants were not allowed then. My third annual performance review contained these two statements: "Wears hair and sideburns longer than I personally like." "Would not have agreed to his transfer had I known he wore a mustache." This was the same manager who told me, "You look like a COFO worker."

National Guard

How old are you?

TN HR

>How old are you?

Suffice to say that The Don is old enough, and certainly from the right geographic location to have probably endured more than just long hair and sideburn employment-related policies.

JudyT929

What's a "COFO worker"? I think I liked the work environment better when there WERE dress codes. I now work for a company that has "business casual" every day and some of these people come to work dressed in ways that I wouldn't even be seen leaving the house.

We have numerous policies that are "stupid" because each manager/director is responsible for enforcing the policies and when they don't bother enforcing them then it's stupid to even have the policys.

We just had to introduce a new policy that people couldn't play computer games or watch movies on their computer. The fact that this was a problem and we have to have a policy kind of worries me.