FMLA When Should We Be Proactive?

We have a policy that says sick time can only be used for yourself and that if you are out to take care of a family member, you must use your vacation time (3 wks/yr). I just ended a conversation with an ee who wanted to know if he had to use his vacation time to take care of his sick spouse. Should I have mentioned FMLA now or would you wait and see if he is out for a long period of time? I know the courts have been funny lately with regard to notfication of the right to FMLA. HIPAA has gotten me out of the habit of asking if it is a serious condition.

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