Death of employee - 1st anniversary

14Riley · June 2004

Last year our office experienced a significant tragedy. One of our employees (with 25 years of service) had a heart attack and died IN THE OFFICE. Many of us witnessed her death and have been affected by the loss. We are approaching the one-year anniversary. I have concerns about our staff and their ability to “cope” with her death. We do have an EAP plan, but I am not sure of how much use it gets. I have been thinking about bringing in a counselor (something we DID NOT do after her death) to talk to/comfort the staff.

In your opinion, will that help the staff, or possibly make them feel worse?

Also, how do I get management to approve the expense of the counselor – they weren’t too keen on the idea last year?

Any other suggestions would be welcome and appreciated.

Thank you, in advance, for your opinions and suggestions!

Don D · June 2004

Your EAP plan has counselors. There is no expense. Talk to them and get their impression of your idea. They'll take it from there. One thing they'll ask is what knowledge do you have that the group will be thinking of or even knowledgeable of he anniversary. Be prepared to answer that one. They'll be glad to be there. If not, replace them with another EAP group.

dynamite9551 · June 2004

i am replying to your post with first-hand experience. most employees are able to deal with grief better than most of us assume. usually grief counselors are brought in after such an event to help them deal with the loss of a co-worker, especially if there was a close-knit relationship; or they witnessed the event, or recently had a death in their own family; or just for purposes of expresseing their feelings. one year anniversaries are more of the memories. unless an employee(s) is/are still struggling with the loss, or have requested some additional grief counseling, i would suggest a wait-and-see method. also, be thinking of ways to remember this employee. sometines, not doing anything is worse than doing everything. give the employees an update on how the family is doing (if this is known), post a collage with pictures of the former employee with memorable quotes from co-workers, or just a note that this person is on everyone's memory - have a moment of silence in the office or shop, make a donation to in their memory. we recently had a long-time employee (a technical manager) with over 25 years drop dead of a massive heart attack while walking through the doors to our shop area. although our staff tried diligently to recussitate him, their efforts were in vain. we still miss him and our emotions have not yet abated. they say time heals all wounds.....whatever you do be sure this is what the employees want! sorry for the long post.

Beave · June 2004

Have you considered a memorial sort of breakfast off site prior to the start of the workday for any employees that would like to attend? No cost to the company & employees that weren't there last year won't feel uncomfortable.

TN HR · June 2004

Without really knowing at what stage of the grieveing (sp?) process you and the rest of the office staff is at, it is very difficult to offer any advice. I would think that, for me, doing this after one year would only re-open an old wound and thus not a good idea.

Please don't take this the wrong way (I may be reading way too much between the lines in your post), but I think you may be personally needing this more than the other employees.

The best advice I can give is to take this as an opportunity to remind all employees (without specifically mentioning the one year anniversary) about the EAP and it's many benefits. I think the message will be loud and clear to those who perhaps need this. This will allow you to fulfill your genuine concern for the other employees without appearing to be imposing or force-feeding something down their throats by bringing a professional in.

Gene

lnelson · June 2004

I agree with TN HR you have the EAP as long as the ees are aware of it that is about all you can do. To have some event for the anniversary may open old wounds and bring you back to square one with the grief your ees may have had or are still having.

Send out a reminder about benefits the EAP plan has to offer.

Pork · June 2004

We have had two deaths in the five years that I have been here; at our Christmas dinner party, I chose to remember our two departed employees during the invocation and thanked the Lord for assigning our friends to watch over us. I have had several employees to compliment my remembering these employees in this fashion. No one complained nor asked me or the company to do more.

In another company, we announced through the management chain that at 10:00 AM on X date, that we would shut down the switchboard for 5 minutes for a silent rememberance of the deceased employee. It worked and everyone who chose to pray did and those that chose to sit quietly for 5 minutes did so. We did not do it again, but the first anniversay was important to many of our employees.

May God assign your deceased employee to overlook the well being of the company and its personnel!

PORK

Rockie · June 2004

We had this happen with a much loved security guard and we planted a dogwood tree in his memory with a little plaque at the base with his name on it. You may want to consider something like this or a "memorial bench" in front of your building with the name on it.

Just some thoughts.

njjel · June 2004

Personally, I like Rockie's idea as it memoralizes the ee without brining religion into the picture.

SDDCHR · June 2004

I don't think that bringing in a counselor 1 year later will help staff. If there are some staff still dealing with it that hard that they may need counseling, then I would hope they take it upon themselves to seek this out. Also, I agee with Rockie's suggestion as this is what we have done in the past....memorial bench, planting a tree, etc. This way, the deceased is always remembered.

14Riley · June 2004

Thank you to all who have given suggestions. I do know that the staff, particularly her staff, has been traumatized by her passing – they were all there to witness it. A number of them, throughout the past year, have mentioned that they still felt the pain. I will remind them of the EAP plan – it is something that I do at least twice a year. I especially like Rockie’s suggestion of planting a tree in her honor. This will acknowledge that we are thinking of her while not bringing religion to the office.

An aside: I have found this forum to be extremely helpful (and fun). Thank you again!

DeidreFR5 · June 2004

Sorry I'm late with this. But, we too just had the first anniversary of our much loved president's passing. He was in his early 50's, healthy and athletic, out on his nightly walk when he dropped dead. Last week on the anniversary, our new president asked every department to meet (it was optional for employees to join in) and each one tell a favorite memory of John. It was very meaningful to the employees who participated. I will say, now that the year is past, we are ready to let go and move on.

Death of employee - 1st anniversary

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