Positive ways to end termination meetings

System · June 2002

I received the following question via e-mail and thought the answer really should come from those who are most experienced on the topic - those of you who have the duty of handling termination meetings.

[blockquote][b]Question:[/b]
In an article HRhero.com had on termination of employees, the last statement was to end on a positive note when you terminate the employee. Could you let me know some examples of what you can say that are positive and not inciteful when you have just terminated an employee? Thank you for your response. [/blockquote]

What works for you? Although every situation is different, what are some positive, helpful things to say in general when ending a termination meeting? Please share!

Christy Reeder
Website Managing Editor
[url]www.HRhero.com[/url]

2626987 · June 2002

[font size="1" color="#FF0000"]LAST EDITED ON 06-29-02 AT 03:23PM (CST)[/font][p]Boy! Oh Boy! This is a tough one. However; When dealing with an "Attendance" issue, I have tried to soften the blow at the close of the meeting with encouraging statements to the now ex-employee that they can begin to work on what ever issues they are dealing with and how this would be a good time to take care of those issues so that they can be well prepared to accept another position in the near future. They usually agree and say goodbye.

Indy E

Hatchetman · June 2002

Of course, depending on the exact reason for firing someone, it may not be appropriate to do one or more of the following:

treat the ex-employee as an individual, who still has value in the workplace;

indicate that even though the individual is being fired that there are many opportunities for him or her and those could include returning to school part time to pick up new skills; starting in a new field of work;

provide information on unemployment insurance and explain what the procedures are for COBRA and other rights the terminated employee may have, inlcuing any right tfor arbitration. Or if the employee brings up a new complaint of "discrimination", a statement that it will be reveiwed in the next day;

provide information on job searches;

listen to what the employee has to say and respond to it.

A lot of leaving the meeting on a positive note is really perception. I think still giving respect is a major step in ending the meeting positively: truthfullness.

Gillian · July 2002

Dignity and respect. This is not the time for arguing or debates about who was right and who was wrong. A simple "wish you the best in whatever you do" is a good end. Anything else might sound contrived.

At the risk of starting a debate, HR shouldn't be in the business of firing people, in my opinion. There are always exceptions or the need for someone to be a witness, but it is difficult for us to be viewed as a nuetral, or somewhere to go if someone needs help, or to bring a problem to our attention, when we are the place where someone goes when they get fired. We may think that we are nuetral and objective, but what is the perception of the employees? That is the key.

Margaret Morford · July 2002

Gillian is correct. We should not be firing managers, but we are responsible for coaching managers so they do it well and with as much rerspect for the individual as possible.

Obviously, it depends on the fact situation. The meeting should be short and fast. Being fired is painful and should not be prolonged for the employee's sake. I usually coach managers to say, "Jane, because of the number of days you have missed, because you continue to make numerous mistakes in your work, etc., I have no other choice but to terminate your employment." I then tell them I'm sorry that it ended this way and I always wish them well going forward. I think it's important to remind the employee that you're not firing them, it's their behavior that got them fired.

Margaret Morford
theHRedge
615-371-8200
[email]mmorford@mleesmith.com[/email]
[url]http://www.thehredge.net[/url]

Paul in Cannon Beach · July 2002

Man, this subject has made my stomach turn in knots just thinking about it. This is an interesting question but terminations are each based on different reasons it is very difficult to say what is appropriate for all situations.

I always tend to want to tell the person why they are being terminated in the hope that they can use that information and learn better work habits. On the other hand, applicants are in a very emotional state and may not be in the mood for words of wisdom.

Rather than worry about how to end the termination meeting, I would be worried that the foundation was laid so that the termination will not be a complete suprise to the emloyee.

[email]paulknoch@hotmail.com[/email]

Don D · July 2002

One truth I've learned over the years with termination meetings, whether its a RIF or a disciplinary termination, is that there is absolutely no way to accurately predict the response and behavior of the terminee (although we probably all try to anticipate that). The one you think will go berserk in the meeting will be the quietest termination you ever had. The one you think is docile and may cry or be really quiet is the one who will challenge you and want to argue her history confrontationally. Sometimes we go into the meeting feeling like we need to be "armed for a bear fight" and we come away from it wanting to hug the ee and offer him support. With another termination, we go into it prepared to console and offer support and the employee bangs the table and won't hear a word you have to say and the meeting ends very unsatisfactorily. These kinds of uncertainties make it tough sometimes to plan and execute successful strategies in termination conferences. I guess the key in preparation and execution is to not emotionalize it, no matter what.

ritaanz · July 2002

Way back to the Stone Age, I reported to the Director of Personnel. He taught me a great deal. The one I have remembered and used many, many times is how to do a termination. His words were: "A good termination lasts 60 seconds. One minute. No longer. After you have told the employee that he is being terminated and why, stand up and walk towards the door. The employee will follow your lead." He also told me that if you get to the point that terminations don't bother you, you should hang up your HR hat and find another profession.

System · July 2002

Terminating an employee is something I hope I never get used to. The day it doesn't bother me is probably the day I need to get out of HR. When I need to terminate someone for poor performance, I point out that we want them to be successful and feel good about their skills and abilities, but that they have not been able to be successful in the job they are in. I then let them know we are releasing them from their employment so that they can go and be successful somewhere else. I know it sounds sappy, but I have had terminated employees thank me before they walk out the door.

HS · July 2002

[font size="1" color="#FF0000"]LAST EDITED ON 07-05-02 AT 02:16PM (CST)[/font][p]As with any separation...layoff or terms...Dignity and respect is absolute key! If this is an ongoing performance issue, it shouldn't be a complete surprise to the employee. I always coach my managers to state the reason for the term...then turn it over to me. To say you're sorry, or waiver in any way makes it seem you're unsure of your decision. Clear, concise and to the point...you have a message, stick to it. Rehearse it if you have to. Then from an HR standpoint: collect any company belongings, talk about COBRA notification, any payout of time earned, about their final paycheck, your reference policy as confirming DOE and title; and lastly about Unemployment. Make sure they know that the state makes the determination (in NJ) of eligibility after they've spoken with the employee.

If you want to end it with an, "I wish you the best of luck in your future endeavors"; or something to that effect, that should be okay. Just keep in mind that anything too "friendly" or "happy-go-lucky" is not being respectful to their situation. Put yourself in their shoes and whatever would feel disrespectful stay away from...and remember how you'd like to be treated were it to ever happen to you.

As a final note, depending on your company and the situation, you may not want the employee back in their area to collect personal belongings. It is appropriate to tell them you will send their things to them.

Positive ways to end termination meetings

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